This July, Let's Care For Ourselves

If you're an expert at everyone's needs except your own, this one's for you

A while back, I listened to this Trauma Rewired episode and was struck by the concept of self-abandonment after complex trauma. The hosts do a great job of explaining how self-neglect, dissociation, masking and fawning are all different facets of the same learned loss of connection to yourself. A fascinating listen - if you can make the time, I highly recommend it.

In the weeks since, I’ve begun noticing acts of self-neglect and abandonment in myself and others. Working 60 hours a week and being unable to rest. Eating a crappy sandwich for lunch while answering emails. Delivering a sales pitch in a damaged suit.

We seem to find it hard to recognise our own needs and act on them, yet we move mountains to make sure our team members, family, and friends are cared for.

This is what led me to choose self-care as the core theme for Trauma At Work this July. I hope this month is a time when work slows down, and you can make a bit more space for yourself.

I invite you to join me on this journey, while acknowledging that there are no simple fixes for this profound disconnect and chronic self-erasure. For many, therapy will be the best place to untangle those deep patterns. What I am proposing we do here sits alongside that work, not in place of it: taking the month of July to practise turning towards ourselves - noticing what we need, finding inspiration, and experimenting with small ways of giving ourselves more.